Chute! Another Project?

Chute? Not Shoot?

Yes, chute.

What is a chute?

A chute is a metal contraption that is used to contain livestock. Generally, chutes are made of metal rods arranged into rectangular boxes, with doors on all four sides. The doors on the sides open for easy access to the animal’s side, allowing vaccinations to be administered, clippings to be done, or any other medical procedures to be preformed. The two narrow sides function as the entrance and exit. The exit of the shoot has a lever that closes two bars on both sides of the animal’s neck, confining them inside the chute.

Of course there are many variations of chutes. There are some that lack exit bars and that just have a gate. Some chutes are called squeeze chutes, which have levers that when pulled, tighten the sides of the chute around the animal. Although it may not seem likely, squeezing an animal in a chute often calms them down. Some chutes have long tunnels that lead up to the entrance, and some chutes are solely the chute itself.

Project 3?

Yes, the dreadful project 3.

What does 1+2=?. Well, it equals 3. And that’s exactly what project 3 is—a mixture of project 1 and project 2. Take the “all writing is a form of authoring” from project 1 and the discourse communities from project 2, and bam! Project 3. Take a piece of writing, like a resume or cover letter, and then using my area of expertise, animal sciences (although I’m hardly an expert), write a cover letter or resume? And then ***Insert more prompt description that I cannot comprehend.***? Yes, that is an intended question mark. What? What is going on in project 3.

            The way I feel about this project is the way I’m sure a cow must feel when going through a chute. While leisurely eating grass in the freedom of their pasture, they are suddenly rounded up by a bunch of no good girls in navy coveralls who intend to make the next hour of the cows’ life miserable. While I imagine this is how the cows feel, in reality, cows are extremely dramatic and are never treated poorly. Halter breaking dairy cows is a necessity in showing them and obviously medical practices are necessary for good health. The entire process of halter breaking and training them, the animals are kept in a stress free environment. They are treated kindly and with respect. They are herded with patience and care. Don’t worry, no cows were harmed in the making of this blog.

            Cows like open spaces—pastures to graze in—so the obvious hesitation a cow feels when being sorted into a tunnel leading to the metal chute is reasonable. As they step closer to the tunnel, cows search around for a way to escape the wall of people behind them, but with nowhere but forward to move, they give in.

They enter the tunnel to the chute with confusion. I imagine them thinking “what are these walls around me. Hey! I can see my friends, oh! And grass, I can see grass. Wait, I can’t reach the grass. These walls, what are these walls? Hi friend! How are you today?”

Generally, cattle will continue through the tunnel, still extremely confused, until they approach the chute entrance. This is where cows must have a brain aneurism. “Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh! Something is in front of me. There is a door. It’s blocking me. I’M TRAPPED! I must back up. Chute, I can’t back up, my friend Betsey is behind me. What do I do? Panic. Panic!”

While standing at the entrance, the exit to the chute is opened, revealing the escape route. At this moment you can definitely see the relief of freedom on the cows face, but yet, they most always linger in the shoot and contemplate walking through the exit. “But wait, can I really walk through there? There is a bar. I have to step over the bar? What if the bar eats me? I’m a dairy cow, I do not taste good. Do not eat me bar! Ah! Walls, walls still around me! Human! Hey humans, I require your assistance. Remove these walls. Save me from that bar. It wants to eat me!”

Just as the cow builds up enough courage to peek her head out of the shoot, SLAM! The chute doors are closed around the cow’s neck.

“OH MY GOSH! HOLY COW. WHAT IS ON MY NECK! GET. IT. OFF! Wait. Wait a minute. This is okay. I cannot move. Okay, okay. I will just sit here. Human! Yes you there. You human, come pet my head and scratch my chin.”

Much like a cow, as I begin down the tunnel to project 3, I’m faced with nothing but confusion. I don’t even understand the prompt. I didn’t understand the first time, nor did I understand the 50^th time I read it.

Still as I try to move forward, I know one thing—It is suggested that I write on my major since this project is supposed to teach us real world writing, and that alone, gets me a little farther down the tunnel and farther away from the wall of bad grades that prevent me from turning around.

But for real? No. I know myself, and much like a cow, I will continue to linger in my confusion as my confusion locks me in! So much confusion!

Tomorrow I have English class and will see Eda, my professor. And when I see her, thank God for the freedom from this confusion! The tunnel doors will open and I’ll be able to see my way out! Clarity. I will finally have some clarity.

The best part of putting a cow through a chute it watching her reaction when she finally decides it’s safe to exit the chute. Sometimes she is on a halter and will jump around, and others, she will sprint for freedom. In some rare cases, a cow suddenly get the idea that she is a giant, warm blood, grand prix jumper, and will jump the bar the holds the front of the chute together AND she will clear the bar by an extra four feet.

When I’m finally able to see the concept and purpose of project three clearly, I hope to be the grand prix cow. I was to excel on my way out of this suppressing confusion. I want to understand, and I want to finish in style. And hopefully after Eda is able to explain project 3 to me, I will be able to write a blog post that actually follows the prompt which reads “For this blog entry assignment, I want you to post a "Road-Map" for Project 3, a road map that you will be planning to use and respond to each other.”

As of right now, my road map says, “in 12 hours, ask Eda what the heck is going on with project 3".”

I’m an animal and veterinary science major, and I’m on Clemson’s dairy science show team. I’m also in a class, which is called Little North America (LNA) which I also work with dairy cows. For show team, I use a Holstein, which is a breed of a dairy cow, heifer, which is a cow that doesn’t produce milk because she hasn’t had a baby yet. My show team heifer’s name is Tilly. Tilly is already halter broken and has won many ribbons in the fall Anderson county fair and the South Carolina State fair. Her next show is the first week of March. Tilly was recently bred and should be having a baby in 9 months. For LNA, also have a Holstein heifer. Her name is Sturgeon, and I’m in the process of halter breaking her for a show in April.

This is Tilly

This is Sturgeon

This is Sturgeon going through the tunnel that leads to the chute. The blue bars at the front are the gates that would be closed around her neck.  

You're Making Me Write an Essay on Writing?

You know when you were little and your parents told you they were FINALLY taking you to your favorite story to use the gift cards you got for Christmas? and your 5 year old self is screaming “Toys R Us!” and your awkward middle school self demands “Aeropostale!” or your independent high school self is just like “why can’t I go by myself?” And your just too excited because you’ve been stuck at your house with all of your extended family and younger cousins that insist on running around and driving you crazy.

So finally, you get in the car and then you realize it. Your parents pulled a fast one on you, and mom is like “First I just need to stop by the post office!” and then dad is like “oh, great I can get my dry cleaning too.” And your left mumbling under your breath. And then once the thank you cards and returns are mailed out and your dad picks up his freshly starched white-collar shirt, you’re finally off to your favorite store. Then, as you pull into the driveway of the tile store so your parents to pick out their new black splash, you wave your white flag and surrender because now you’re in the back seat dying of defeat.

This is how I felt about project 1.

When I sat down in my first college English class, and thank God my only English class (No offense Eda), I was all mopey and grumbly because I’m an Animal and Veterinary Sciences Major, and what does that have to do with writing? Last time I checked, the amount of food a chicken eats, or the purpose companion animal vaccinations, or what comes out of the back end of a cow has nothing to do with English. But lets be honest, I love to write. Especially in informal settings, much like this, when I can basically write what I’m thinking down. (An by the way, according to Stephen King, you’re telepathic because you’re reading my mind—think about it) So when Eda, my lovely English professor, told the class we were doing blogs, I was thinking “Eda, you da bomb.com.” I have never blogged before, but I have desired to in the past, so I was excited to finally have the push to do it.

And then Eda pulled a fast one on us.

When Eda told us “Its time to start Project 1,” and mind you, in her awesome Turkish accent, I obviously was not impressed. Or excited. Or anything that implies happiness. But if we are being honest, I knew project 1 was coming.

So Project 1: Is Everyone an Author? Have you ever considered the person who writes the little blurb on the back of a postcard an author? Or how about you? Have you ever sent a postcard? And when you did, did you consider yourself an author? Well if you read my essay, all 1,497 words of it, you will be informed that, yes, the person who writes the tidbit about Salem, Massachusetts, or Las Vegas, Nevada, or New York, New York, is in fact, an author. And you will also be informed that you too, as the sender, are an author too.

But how did I feel about this essay, Project 1? Actually, if I could possibly enjoy writing an essay, I could enjoy writing this one. The topic of “Is Everyone an Author” seemed to me to be pretty original, and I felt like the bomb.com for picking a postcard, which was so unique, that the proper way to cite it could not be found by Eda, my MLA textbook, or Google. This project really allowed me to realize my writing abilities, as well as my ability to critically analyze a piece of text on my own. And that was enjoyable. The essay itself wasn’t that awful to write either. The words just came to mind and I typed them out as I thought, but I think I owe the ease of this assignment to both my high school English teacher and Eda.

Mrs. Reaves, my AP composition teacher, did a fantastic job preparing the class for this entry level, college English course. And Eda made writing this essay quite simple, even though she may not know it, because she provided me with a lot of my resources. For example, every day for homework, Eda assigns a reading from our textbook AND an additional reading from an outside text (Which we already tried to veto, but had no luck). But one reading in particular, by Stephen King, actually contained the perfect points to substantiate my argument that the sender of a postcard is an author. Another cool thing that Eda did, that I really enjoyed, like really, was she canceled class for the day. Whoop Whoop! But by canceling class, she gave us the time to come to her office and have a one on one conference with her to discuss how our essays were going and to ask any questions we had. This, I thought, was extremely helpful because not only was I able to take an hour and an half nap instead of an half hour nap, Eda was available to help me with the citation of my postcard, which we basically ended up winging off of the MLA rules for a visual text.

If I really had a choice in the matter, would I have picked to do Project 1 for fun? Of course not? But overall, Project 1 was bearable. Now off to bigger and better things, or longer and more terrible things with Projects 2,3,4 and 5”.”

(& because I love cows, I'm demanding you love them too. Say hi to Tilly)